-------- I think I lose all motivation to care about what I do. I'm just so sick of the same thing over and over again, the same fucked up cycle. Is there only one way to go about life? I mean what the fuck else are we expected to do. I feel like I fucked up big time, I had all the time in the world and where did it go? Pissed it away with all my hopes and dreams. I'm sick and tired of life, it's just so meaningless to go on. I wanna do something else with my life, something I can find meaning in, not something that just sucks the life right out of me. All my life, the same damn shit, same fucking way of living. Is there no out? Are there no other fucking ways of life? This time I really felt like I didn't give it my all because I didn't want to, subconsciously I couldn't really give myself a good enough reason to try because in the end I couldn't find a good enough goal to look forward to. I could learn something in a day and somehow forget it all the next, in the back of mind there's no reason why I should try. I really just want a simple life, just my basic needs and maybe just a little bit more once in a while. Just look at it this way, so what if I do well, I get into a good university, in the end I'm still doing the same fucking shit. When does this life end and the next one begin? | 10:49 PM |